Wedding Planning - Handling things that go wrong on the day

 Your wedding day is one of the most important and memorable days of your life. You've probably spent months, maybe even years, planning every little detail to perfection. But as with any big event, things don’t always go exactly as planned.

The key to a stress-free and enjoyable wedding day is being prepared for the unexpected and knowing how to handle any hiccups that might come your way.

Check out our suggestion for tackling some common wedding day mishaps with grace and ease.

1. Weather Woes

Outdoor weddings are beautiful, but Mother Nature doesn’t always cooperate. If you’re planning an outdoor ceremony or reception, have a backup plan in place. Rent a portable tent or marquee, arrange for an indoor space you can move to if the weather is bad, or provide guests with umbrellas and blankets in case of rain or chilly weather. If it's hot, have large umbrellas on stands, fans, water stations, and shaded areas available.

2. Wardrobe Malfunctions

A torn hem, a broken zipper, or a missing button can cause last-minute panic. Pack an emergency kit with a sewing kit, safety pins, double-sided tape, and stain remover wipes. Designate a bridesmaid or groomsman, or even a trusted friend or family member as the go-to fixer for any fashion emergencies.

3. Late or Missing Vendors

If a vendor is running late or doesn’t show up, stay calm and where you can, delegate. Have a trusted friend or wedding planner handle the situation for you if that’s at all possible. Pre-confirming all vendors is wise in the weeks leading up to the big day, and have a list of backup vendors just in case.

4. Technical Difficulties

From a microphone not working to a DJ’s playlist disappearing, technology can fail at the worst moments. Do a sound check before the ceremony, have a backup speaker, and store important playlists on multiple devices. A good wedding coordinator or celebrant will be able to adapt and keep everything going no matter what! The main objective of the day is to be married to the one you love, so as long as that happens, it’s all good.

5. Family or Guest Drama

As many couples are aware, weddings bring together people who may not always get along. If tensions are high, consider assigning a trusted friend or relative to play peacemaker. Plan your seating arrangements carefully, and remind everyone that the day is about love and celebration, not old grudges.

6. Running Behind Schedule

Timelines are great, but delays happen. Make sure your schedule has a little extra time built in as a buffer for hair and makeup, travel, and photography. If things start to run late, prioritize the most important things and trust your wedding planner or coordinator (if you have one) to help keep things moving smoothly.

7. Food or Cake Mishaps

If your caterer is running late or a cake gets damaged, remain calm (or at least try to!) and be flexible. Most caterers have contingency plans, and your venue may have extra supplies. If your dream cake gets smudged, embrace the imperfection—it’s a great story for later!

8. Cold Feet or Emotional Overload

It’s completely normal for both brides and grooms to feel overwhelmed or nervous in the days before the wedding and especially on the day. Take a few deep breaths, step away for a quiet moment if needed, and remind yourself why you’re getting married. Surround yourself with positive, supportive people who will keep you calm and excited, and as the wedding is taking place and you are standing there, staring at the one you love, soak it in. Let that wave of love, excitement and joy for the future engulf you together.

9. Remember the Bigger Picture

At the end of the day, your wedding is about celebrating love and starting a new chapter.  As I said before, the goal of the day is to be married – and you will be!

Things may go wrong, but what matters most is that you and your partner are surrounded by love, joy, and the people who care about you. Embrace the unexpected, laugh at the little hiccups, and enjoy every moment – both good and not so good!

Final Thoughts No wedding is ever truly perfect, but that’s what makes it uniquely yours. The most important thing is to stay flexible, focus on the love you’re celebrating, and make wonderful memories—no matter what surprises come your way.

XX

Wedding Planning - family arguments and disagreements

Over the last 20 years as a marriage and funeral celebrant, I have seen literally everything when it comes to weddings, planning stress and family difficulties.

I have worked with so many couples who were dealing with issues like:

• Family disputes

• Divorced and non-speaking parents

• Family issues related to dislike of the person you’re marrying

• Family or friends who are refusing to come because someone they don't like is invited

• Bridal party fights and issues

• Bridal party members who are making trouble or not showing up

• Issues around kids being invited

• and religious issues for the couple and their families

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. There are so many more!

So, the point of this post is to consider some of the ways couples can reduce their stress around these issues so that they can have the day they want to have, not the day that has been changed and even at times ruined by others.

REMEMBER: No matter what happens, at the end of the day, the goal through all of this is to be married and you will be. You absolutely will be.

Preparing for potential issues:

It is rare for a couple to plan a wedding without encountering a single hiccup. It's important to remember, you are not alone if you're facing some stressful issues. However, you can set yourselves up for a smoother ride by panning ahead. 

First, from the moment you get engaged, understand that problems will come up and accept that. Things won't run perfectly so don't be alarmed when something does happen.

Second, don't overreact. In high stress situations it's easy to catastrophise, so when something does come up, take a minute, breathe and look at the big picture BEFORE reacting or saying anything you might regret. Give yourself a minute to think.

Third, assess whether the issue/s will really have an impact on you and your partner long-term. Will this be something that causes long-term harm, or is it just a hiccup that won't matter too much when you're looking back at the day in years to come. Talk it over with your partner and make sure you agree on your assessment of the situation. You're a team!

Fourth, understand that while your wedding is important, people around you have things going on too. When someone can't make it, can't get a baby sitter for that night, or can't help you with something they said they would, let yourself feel the irritation and move on quickly. People have things going on that others might not know about and it's better to just move on quickly and find another option rather than dwell on why they can't help or whatever the situation might be. Dwelling will waste your energy and lower your mood. Don't let the actions of others reduce your excitement and shine.

Fifth, build in pockets of time in the lead up to the wedding to take time out and de-stress. Take some time alone to remind yourself that the point of getting married is to commit to your partner. It is not to have every tiny detail fall perfectly into place for your fairytale. Relax, meditate if you need or just go for a calm walk in nature and reset your emotions so you can keep moving forward with a clear head. (Check out our post for Bridal Meditation).

Sixth, and last but not least, while it is your big day and your family and friends should behave well and support you, ALWAY try to put yourself in the other person/peoples position when issues arise. If it is a family member who doesn't want to see another guest, try to be empathetic and do what you can, but if you can't resolve it, simply explain to the person that you can't and allow them to either suggest a solution or not attend if they feel they can't. Forcing people into uncomfortable situations isn't good for anyone, including you and your partner. If it is someone who is wanting to bring their child and you are having a child-free wedding, simply write them a nice message saying that you totally understand if they can't make it due to parenting responsibilities. Many couples are now live-streaming their ceremony so distant family and friends can still attend (and it's a great way to reduce cost!)

REMEBER - be calm and empathetic but firm in your responses to issues that others bring up. Even if all of the above were to happen, and even if important people couldn't be there for you, the wedding is about marrying your partner and by the end of the day, you will be married. That's all that really matters. 

Check out some of our other posts for other ideas while planning your big day.

Good Luck!

The Wedding Gurus xx